Monday, March 14, 2011

Be Kind, Rewind

Some of us Drivers go to great lengths to make certain the bus is clean.
We clean all the trash from the seats and floors.
We clean the windows and keep some open to allow fresh air to circulate.

We manage the thermostat to ensure that you are as comfortable as possible.

We clean and iron our uniforms.
We stay well groomed and shower.
We use aftershaves, colognes, brush our teeth and chew gum.

Other Drivers have even taught me to carry air fresheners and sprays.

Many of us don't simply get in the bus and drive, we want the Passenger to be just as comfortable if not more so on the bus.
After all, we are trying to garner and keep your business as customers.

To us you're not just cattle that we must load, transport and offload at the next stop.

You're a person with whom we develope relationships, with whom we've become familiar and whose trust and respect we've worked hard to earn.

One of the most embarassing things that can happen to us is that we sit in those seats and after a few minutes of warming it up we start to smell like funk.
And not just your average kinda of funk.
But the nasty killer butt sweat funk that smells like dead animals on the side of the road kind of funk.
Like somebody hasn't showered in two weeks, was working out every day of those two weeks, soiled their underwear every day of those two weeks and spent all two weeks sitting in that chair!

Passengers get on the bus and you can see it in their faces immediately.
Y'all have that look like you have just been punched in the face and stomach.


Trust me, I've spent an entire bottle of Lysol or FeBreeze soaking this chair.
And it's still so bad that nobody will sit within the first two rows of seats on the bus.
Folks are standing in the aisles rather than sit too close.
Passengers in wheelchairs are trying to get down the aisle to the back of the bus, standing up and carrying their chairs over their heads to get away from that smell!

The smell is so bad that I can barely see the road through the tears in my eyes.
I can barely breath.

Sorry folks.
I'm one of those Drivers who does his best to keep the bus and its Driver clean and smelling fresh.
I'm mortified and embarassed by this stench.

But for all of us Drivers who go to those lengths to keep things clean and fresh, there are at least as many who obviously do just the opposite.
I seem to be the lucky Driver who "makes relief" for many of those Drivers.

Not only is it hell for the Passengers and us Drivers who follow these Drivers but that stink soaks into me as well.
I have to drive my personal vehicle home after work and my personal vehicle absorbs that funk.

Other Drivers tell me it's a hazard of the job.
We catch all the colds our Passengers have and we carry all the stenches the other Drivers pass on as well.

Whatever the reason, I'm passing on my hard core apologies to all my Passengers for that horrible stink today.
I'm passing on my hard core condemnations to my fellow Drivers and co-workers who are supposed to clean the buses and remove those odors.

This is where I usually invite y'all aboard but at this point, I think it's better for your health & safety to take the bus behind me.
When you see me, your Driver crying, face red and nose running...
Consider that fair warning!

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