T'Ain't No Such Thang As A Free Lunch!

Bus is full, to the brim.
Standing room only.
I'm at the Colfax & Broadway intersection outside of the Civic Centre.
More people are trying to get on the bus.

Every time I get ready to pull out, another passenger or two runs up and pounds on the door to get in.
And at least one of each of the new group has nothing but small change to feed the fare box or they are digging deeply into their pockets and bags as if they weren't aware they were about to board a bus that required them to have their fare ready!

Either way, we are becoming later and later leaving the stop and the bus is filling further and further beyond capacity and tempers are growing shorter and shorter...

At one point - the last time I opened the door to let a runner board, go figure - a kid, maybe 21/22 gets on, skateboard in hand.
Got his wife beater on, hat on backwards.
Shorts hanging down around his knees, cig hanging off his lip.

He says, "Can I get on for free?"
I simply replied, "Fare's two-twenty-five."
He says, "I got the cash, I just don't wanna pay, I'm only going a couple of blocks..."

I didn't even have time to laugh out loud.
The crowd exploded around me.
When they were done and I'd closed the door and was driving away, I think I was still crying from how hard I was laughing!

"Get off the effing bus, you moocher!"
"Shut the door on his [butt]!"
"You don't get no effing free ride [butthole]!"
"Hey D-bag, get an effing job like the rest of us and pay your fare!"

But the best that came out was the very last.
The kid never blinked at all the other comments and turned to me and asked,
"Can I get a transfer at least?"

I'd been doing my best poker face to this point and was laughing my behind off on the inside but I think a tear squeezed out as I said, "Are you serious?" then almost broke.

The bus was quiet.
One passenger from the front came up to the kid and asked his name then asked him where he worked.
The kid said, "Best Buy."
Passenger, "How about we come to your work and you give us some free [poop] then we'll give you a free ride?"

They all exploded again but this time they were all laughing and I couldn't help it, I let loose as well.
The kid left without so much as a one finger salute.

As we drove away, I must have laughed/cried for at least another two blocks.

Best Day Eva!

As Always, "Welcome aboard, pay your fare, find your seats - Let's Roll!"